Witches' Charms: Paranormal Cozy Mystery Series (Vampires and Wine Book 3) Page 2

  Aunt Agnes rolled her eyes. “Dorothy, you really need to get some glasses. Mr Maxwell, the phone only works intermittently, but we don’t like being disturbed by phone calls, and so it doesn’t matter.”

  “But you run a business here,” Joseph Maxwell said in disbelief.

  “Yes, but our bookings are online,” Aunt Agnes said firmly.

  “That’s right. Bookings come through to our iPads which we have with another phone company,” I added firmly. “Our iPads use 4G. When do you think Ozfoneandnet will offer ADSL out here, Mr Smith? And when will NBN be available here?” I hoped going on the offensive would take his mind off the telephone, and it seemed that it did.

  “What’s NBN?” Aunt Dorothy asked, looming over him.

  Joseph Maxwell looked at Dorothy as if she had climbed out from under a rock. “Why, it’s the National Broadband Network, of course. Everyone knows that.” He took a step backwards, presumably to escape from her gin-laden breath, and addressed me. “I’m afraid you will have to wait until the NBN comes.”

  “And when will that be?” I asked.

  “Not for two or more years,” he said in a self-satisfied manner. “At least.”

  “What about ADSL then?”

  He shook his head. “If the NBN is coming within the next few years, then Ozfoneandnet cannot make any ADSL ports available. What’s more, we are not allowed to provide anyone with broadband if NBN is a year or two away.”

  I was already aware of this, and added, “Well, that’s ridiculous!”

  He held up his hands. “Don’t shoot the messenger! It’s the government’s rules, not ours.” With that, he smirked and took his leave.

  “What a horrid little man,” Aunt Maude said. “Valkyrie, why were you asking him about having the internet connected? We already have the internet connected.”

  Aunt Agnes sighed dramatically. “Are you both fools? Valkyrie was obviously trying to throw him off the scent. To explain more clearly, she was trying to make him forget that we had a phone when we weren’t supposed to have one. She was trying to make him defensive about not providing internet to this area.”

  I nodded, but before I had a chance to speak, Aunt Dorothy butted in. “Why are you addressing me, Agnes? Maude asked the question, not me. Why do you always say ‘the two of you’ when it’s always only Maude?”

  Maude rounded on her. “It’s not always me. It’s you. You’re the one who can’t understand anything, not me.”

  Dorothy and Maude got into a heated argument. I turned to Aunt Agnes. “Do you think he’ll make any trouble? I mean, when he thinks more on the phone situation?”

  Aunt Agnes bit her lip. “I don’t think so. After all, phone lines were laid here. He will no doubt think it strange, but I’m sure he won’t give it too much thought. Now Valkyrie, go back and lie on the sofa. You’re still supposed to be resting up.”

  I sighed. Since Lucas had brought me home the night before last, the aunts had insisted I stay on the sofa to recover, rather than go back to my own cottage which was only a short distance away. At least my newly adopted cat, Hecate, had come to keep me company. I sat on the sofa, my iPad next to me, and Hecate jumped up and demanded I scratch her under her chin.

  Aunt Maude hurried in with a goblet of red liquid. “Here, drink this.”

  “If I drink any more Witches’ Brew, I’ll turn into a…” My voice trailed away. Witches’ Brew was a magical wine produced by Ambrosia Winery, a winery formerly owned by Lucas O’Callaghan’s deceased uncle, Henry Ichor. Lucas O’Callaghan was my crush, a stereotypically tall, dark, and handsome man who smelled like cinnamon and ancient sage, and made my heart race at the very thought of his name. He, too, had come to town recently. Oh, and he was a vampire.

  Lucas’s winery was one of the few in Australia that made what was commonly referred to as Witches’ Brew, but was, in fact, a wine-potion full of iron and the other necessary vitamins and minerals that vampires needed. My aunts had assured me that real-life vampires were never overcome by bloodlust, but then they had never been altogether too truthful with me. I had always suspected that Witches’ Brew might prevent bloodlust, but I couldn’t be sure. Still, I had only recently found out I was a vampire, and I’d never suffered bloodlust in the past. In fact, I was given to fainting at the sight of blood. I had always been anaemic until I moved to Lighthouse Bay and started drinking Witches’ Brew. It seemed to be a panacea that cured all ills.

  I had also discovered that I was a witch-vampire, and so were my aunts. Apparently, my parents had wanted to keep that fact from me. They had gone missing just over five years ago, when on sabbatical to Kyrgyzstan. The news that I was a vampire had proven to be a terrible shock, as would be expected. I had been firmly convinced that such things didn’t exist. I was also shocked to find out that one of the boarders, Linda Williams, was a Shifter wolf. Of course, I hadn’t thought they existed, either. After Linda’s husband was murdered only recently, she and I had become quite good friends. In fact, we were well on our way to becoming besties.

  Of course, it had been difficult to accept the fact that I was a vampire, and if that wasn’t bad enough, Linda had told me that my crush, Lucas O’Callaghan, was the most terrifying type of vampire out there, a Cleaner. She had told me that Cleaners answered to no one. It was Cleaners who were responsible for keeping the presence of vampires and werewolves from the public and more importantly, from governments. She had told me that they would take any measures necessary. I shivered involuntarily.

  Did Lucas know I was a vampire? When Jack Murphy, the murderer of Linda’s husband, had tried to kill me two days ago and had run my car, or rather, Aunt Agnes’s car, off the road, Lucas had given me Witches’ Brew to drink. That surely meant he knew I was a vampire, although he didn’t state so explicitly. His actions, if not his words, revealed him as a vampire to me.

  And speak of the devil, who should walk through the door now but Lucas O’Callaghan.

  “You look white,” he said by way of greeting. “I trust you’re not feeling worse?”

  He took a seat opposite me, on a pale blue chair I had bought just the other day from a bargain furniture store, much to my aunts’ horror. They far preferred musty antique furniture that smelled of dust and mould, and held within the aura of every former owner and every former setting.

  I took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. “I’m feeling quite good, actually. I’m still bruised, and my foot hasn’t completely healed where I stepped on something when I was running through the bush, but I don’t feel dizzy anymore.”

  “You were lucky,” Lucas said. “He ran you off the road and then shot at you. It could have been worse. Are you sure you’re all right?”

  He looked so concerned that I hurried to explain. “We just had a bit of a thing with the local Ozfoneandnet man.” I silently rebuked myself as soon as I said it. Now I would have to explain. I pressed on. “I reported a problem with the internet here, but it was just that the modem needed to be turned on and off. I didn’t know where the modem was, and my aunts were away all night, so I rang Ozfoneandnet to complain and they sent the man out.” I felt bad lying to him, but I could hardly tell him the truth.

  Lucas raised his eyebrows. “That’s not like Ozfoneandnet to act so promptly.” His tone held more than a measure of disbelief.

  I laughed. “You haven’t heard me complain. I complained loudly and bitterly for hours—and I mean hours—all morning.” As soon as I said it, I didn’t think I should have sold myself to him as someone who complained loudly. Not quite the image of the wonderful future girlfriend I was trying to portray.

  Lucas’s mouth twitched slightly. “I see.” He pulled a bunch of flowers from behind his back. “For you.”

  I gasped. There were several magnificent, blood red roses. “They’re beautiful,” I said breathlessly.

  Unfortunately, Aunt Agnes whipped into the room and snatched the roses from me. “I’ll put them in a vase,” she said, regarding Lucas with narrowed eyes. Th
e aunts knew that Lucas was a Cleaner, and had also told me that they were sure Lucas didn’t know they were vampires. I wasn’t so sure of that, given that I was fairly certain Lucas knew I was one. I hadn’t told the aunts that Lucas likely knew I was a vampire, and I hoped that fact wouldn’t come back to bite me—no pun intended.

  A loud knock on the door broke me from my thoughts. I made to get up from the sofa, ignoring Hecate’s protests, but Lucas waved me back down. “Your aunts can get it.”

  I nodded. “It must be the new guest this time.”

  Sure enough, I heard one of the aunts moving to the door, and heard the heavy oak door creak open. “Hello, welcome to Mugwort Manor. You must be Scorpius Everyman.”

  I heard a sharp intake of breath and looked at Lucas. His face had gone pale, paler than I even thought possible.

  Chapter 3

  I got off the couch, and this time, Lucas made no attempt to stop me.

  I heard the man’s voice say, “Yes, I am,” and his voice held menace. A cold shiver ran up my spine, and I came to a halt, rooted to the spot, trembling. His voice was worse than fingernails on a blackboard, like shards of glass falling into an abyss. His very appearance struck terror into my soul. He reminded me of Voldemort—the way I thought of Voldemort from the books, not the way he looked in the films. The film Voldemort didn’t scare me for some reason. This man had an ancient air about him, an air of malevolence, of threat.

  Or was I being fanciful? Was I simply overreacting because Lucas had gone white? Aunt Maude certainly was showing no sign anything was amiss. I turned and hurried back to the living room. To my surprise, Lucas was gone, the heavy drapes at the large window moving in the gentle breeze.

  I walked back into the foyer, and Aunt Maude promptly introduced me to the man. We shook hands. His grip was firm, and he looked at me as if he was looking right through me. I felt as if I had touched evil itself. The other aunts came into the room and they, like Aunt Maude, did not give any indication that they felt the same way about the man as I did. To me, he didn’t seem quite human.

  “Valkyrie will show you to your cottage,” Aunt Agnes said, but I cut her off.

  “I’m sorry, Aunt Agnes, but I’m still not feeling well.”

  Agnes waved a hand at me. “Of course, how silly of me.” Turning to the man, she added, “Poor Valkyrie hasn’t been too well for the last few days. She normally lives in the Assistant Lighthouse Keeper’s cottage, but we’ve insisted she stay with us until she feels a little better.” She shot the man a winning smile, but he did not respond. He looked at me with eyes so pale and ice blue that they could almost be blank. I did my best not to shudder. “Well, Valkyrie, you go back and lie down, and Maude, Dorothy, and I will collect Mr Everyman’s luggage and escort him to his cottage.”

  When they were safely out of earshot, I addressed the cat. “What do you think that was all about? Lucas obviously knows him, but it’s going a bit too far to climb out a window. I wonder if the aunts know who he is?”

  I paced up and down the room for what seemed like an eternity before the aunts returned. “Are you feeling worse, Valkyrie?” Aunt Agnes asked with concern, before she was even halfway through the door into the living room.

  “I feel fine, it’s just that the guest completely creeped me out,” I said hurriedly. “Didn’t you notice anything wrong with him?”

  The aunts exchanged glances, but shook heads. “What do you mean, dear?” Aunt Dorothy said, staring fixedly at the cat.

  I waved my hands in the air. “I’m over here, Aunt Dorothy. Are the three of you really going to say you didn’t notice anything wrong, or is this one of those times when you pretend nothing is wrong, but you’re keeping information from me?”

  Aunt Agnes clutched her chest. “How could you say such a thing, Valkyrie? Of course we’re not keeping anything from you. The man seems a very pleasant guest. Well, maybe he doesn’t seem pleasant, but he seems normal, completely normal.”

  “But my right eye twitched as soon as the doorbell rang,” I said, “and that only happens when something bad is about to happen. Are there other things besides vampires and werewolves?”

  “They call werewolves ‘Shifter wolves’ these days,” Aunt Maude said.

  Aunt Dorothy rolled her eyes. “Not that again!”

  “Please don’t try to change the subject, aunts. Are there other things out there besides vampires and Shifter wolves, well, Shifters in general?”

  “I don’t know what you mean.” Aunt Agnes’s face was one of innocence.

  “I mean like demons, or aliens, or some otherworldly entities. Ringwraiths? Dementors? Anything like that?”

  The aunts burst into laughter. “You’ve been reading too many books, dear,” Aunt Agnes said. “Those exist only in fiction.”

  I rubbed my forehead in exasperation. “You know what I mean. Please just give me a straight answer for once. Are there such things as demons? Are there other sorts of unusual beings, apart from vampires and Shifters?”

  “Well, I don’t think we’re unusual,” Aunt Dorothy said, sounding rather pained.

  “No, I don’t think demons exist,” Aunt Agnes said, ignoring Dorothy. “I’m sure they do exist, but I mean they don’t appear in human form. Then again, I suppose they could appear in human form, but I don’t think that man, Scorpius Everyman, is a demon.”

  My head was spinning, but I supposed that was about as clear an answer as I was going to get. Still, I pressed on. “And his name! Scorpius Everyman, I mean, seriously? That’s obviously a fake name.”

  Aunt Maude screwed up her nose. “It’s not nice to make fun of people for their names, dear, and might I remind you, your name is Valkyrie Chooser of the Slain Who Shall Enter Valhalla.”

  I threw up my hands in despair. “I need to go for a walk along the beach.”

  “It’s getting cold,” Aunt Agnes protested. “What about the wound under your foot? And there won’t be anyone else at the beach.”

  I nodded. “That’s just how I like it.”

  I grabbed my coat from the back of the sofa, and headed for the front door, amidst protests of concerns about my health. My right eye was twitching like crazy, and it was a reliable indicator that something was wrong. Well, it was reliable in the sense that something happened without fail after it twitched, but many a time bad things happened after my right eye had not even bothered to twitch.

  It had been a stressful week, what with Jack Murphy running me off the road because I had discovered that he murdered Linda’s husband, Paul. Still, there was no love lost between Linda and Paul, and Paul had thrown the murderer’s taxidermied dog across the room. Don’t get me wrong, nobody deserves to die, but doing that to someone’s beloved, albeit stuffed, pet should be grounds for some remission of sentence.

  I thought a nice brisk walk along the beach would cheer me up and clear my head, and then I could return to Mugwort Manor for a nice dinner and a full glass of Witches’ Brew. I kept to the far edge of the track to the beach, hoping I wouldn’t run into Scorpius Everyman, if that really was his name. I bet he was some ancient demon. There was something about him that gave me the creeps, and when he had shaken my hand and looked into my eyes, my blood had run cold. He sure didn’t seem wholly mortal to me.

  Luckily, I didn’t meet with anyone, demons, badly named men, or even people walking their dogs. The drop in temperature had cleared the beach of civilisation, and for that I was grateful. I walked along, relishing the scent of salty air, and the feel of the sand beneath my feet. The injury to my foot stung a little, but it wasn’t too bad. This was a lovely, pristine beach—no broken shells or stinging box jellyfish ever washed up here, only pieces of driftwood every now and then.

  I walked further than usual, lost in my thoughts, and then figured I had better turn back. With my vampire speed, I knew I could outrun anyone else, although the new guest had my nerves on edge. And why had Lucas looked so shocked at the mention of the man’s name? And had Lucas really climbed out the w
indow? Or had he simply slipped out unannounced through the back of the manor? I had no idea, but I was certainly going to ask him the next time I saw him.

  I walked close to the rocks that signalled the end of my walk, and made to turn left to walk up the sandy track back to the manor, when I saw a strange blob ahead of me, in the shallow water at the base of the largest rock. I caught my breath. I hoped it wasn’t an injured dolphin. I hurried over, and gasped.

  It was the body of a man, a deceased man, and he looked like he was the victim of a shark attack.

  Chapter 4

  I reached into my pocket for my phone, averting my eyes from the grisly scene. I realised I had left my phone in the house. I looked at the ocean to see if the tide was going out and so would take the corpse with it. The tide actually looked like it was coming in, but even if it wasn’t, there was nothing I intended to do about it.

  I turned and ran back for the manor. It was heavy going, because the sand was deep, but I had no time to worry about burning calves. I rounded the corner and ran straight into a man.

  I jumped backwards. It was the creepy Scorpius Everyman.

  “Miss Jasper, is something wrong?”

  I struggled from his grip and took a step backwards. “Dead man, in the water.” I pointed, somewhat unnecessarily, in the direction of the sea. “I think a shark got him. I’ve got to call the police.”

  “Where?” he said coldly.

  “Next to the big rock, the first rock as you go down to the beach. I was worried the tide would take him out to sea, but I think the tide’s coming in.” I had no idea why I was talking so much to the man, but I supposed I was in shock.

  He immediately took charge of the situation. “You run and call the police and then bring them straight down there. I’ll go and wait by the body.” I must’ve looked doubtful, because he added, albeit in an unemotional tone, “Don’t worry, Miss Jasper, I won’t contaminate the scene. I’m a private detective.” With that, he took off at a jog towards the beach while I took off in the direction of Mugwort Manor.