The Halloween Pumpkin Spell
The Halloween Pumpkin Spell
The Kitchen Witch, Book 11
Morgana Best
The Halloween Pumpkin Spell
(The Kitchen Witch, Book 11)
Copyright © 2018 by Morgana Best
All rights reserved.
ISBN 9781925674835
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The personal names have been invented by the author, and any likeness to the name of any person, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
This book may contain references to specific commercial products, process or service by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, or otherwise, specific brand-name products and/or trade names of products, which are trademarks or registered trademarks and/or trade names, and these are property of their respective owners. Morgana Best or her associates, have no association with any specific commercial products, process, or service by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, or otherwise, specific brand-name products and / or trade names of products.
By this act
And words of rhyme
Trouble not
These books of mine
With these words I now thee render
Candle burn and bad return
3 times stronger to its sender.
(Ancient Celtic)
Contents
Glossary
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Connect with Morgana
Also by Morgana Best
About Morgana Best
Excerpt from Witches’ Brew
Glossary
The author has used Australian spelling in this series. Here are a few examples: Mum instead of the US spelling Mom, neighbour instead of the US spelling neighbor, realise instead of the US spelling realize. It is Ms, Mr and Mrs in Australia, not Ms., Mr. and Mrs.; defence not defense; judgement not judgment; cosy and not cozy; 1930s not 1930’s; offence not offense; centre not center; towards not toward; jewellery not jewelry; favour not favor; mould not mold; two storey house not two story house; practise (verb) not practice (verb); odour not odor; smelt not smelled; travelling not traveling; liquorice not licorice; cheque not check; leant not leaned; have concussion not have a concussion; anti clockwise not counterclockwise; go to hospital not go to the hospital; sceptic not skeptic; aluminium not aluminum; learnt not learned. We have fancy dress parties not costume parties. We don’t say gotten. We say car crash (or accident) not car wreck. We say a herb not an herb as we produce the ‘h.’
The above are just a few examples.
It’s not just different words; Aussies sometimes use different expressions in sentence structure. We might eat a curry not eat curry. We might say in the main street not on the main street. Someone might be going well instead of doing well. We say without drawing breath not without drawing a breath.
These are just some of the differences.
Please note that these are not mistakes or typos, but correct, normal Aussie spelling, terms, and syntax.
* * *
AUSTRALIAN SLANG AND TERMS
Benchtops - counter tops (kitchen)
Big Smoke - a city
Blighter - infuriating or good-for-nothing person
Blimey - an expression of surprise
Bloke - a man (usually used in nice sense, “a good bloke”)
Blue - an argument
Bluestone - copper sulphate (copper sulfate in US spelling)
Bluo - a blue laundry additive, an optical brightener
Boot (car) - trunk (car)
Bonnet (car) - hood (car)
Bore - a drilled water well
Budgie smugglers (variant: budgy smugglers) - named after the Aussie native bird, the budgerigar. A slang term for brief and tight-fitting men’s swimwear
Bugger! - as an expression of surprise, not a swear word
Bugger - as in “the poor bugger” - refers to an unfortunate person (not a swear word)
Bunging it on - faking something, pretending
Bush telegraph - the grapevine, the way news spreads by word of mouth in the country
Car park - parking lot
Cark it - die
Chooks - chickens
Come good - turn out okay
Copper, cop - police officer
Coot - silly or annoying person
Cream bun - a sweet bread roll with copious amounts of cream, plus jam (= jelly in US) in the centre
Crook - 1. “Go crook (on someone)” - to berate them. 2. (someone is) crook - (someone is) ill. 3. Crook (noun) - a criminal
Demister (in car) - defroster
Drongo - an idiot
Dunny - an outhouse, a toilet, often ramshackle
Fair crack of the whip - a request to be fair, reasonable, just
Flannelette (fabric) - cotton, wool, or synthetic fabric, one side of which has a soft finish. Breathable.
Flat out like a lizard drinking water - very busy
Galah - an idiot
Garbage - trash
G’day - Hello
Give a lift (to someone) - give a ride (to someone)
Goosebumps - goose pimples
Gumboots - rubber boots, wellingtons
Knickers - women’s underwear
Laundry (referring to the room) - laundry room
Lamingtons - iconic Aussie cakes, square, sponge, chocolate-dipped, and coated with desiccated coconut. Some have a layer of cream and strawberry jam (= jelly in US) between the two halves.
Lift - elevator
Like a stunned mullet - very surprised
Mad as a cut snake - either insane or very angry
Mallee bull (as fit as, as mad as) - angry and/or fit, robust, super strong.
Miles - while Australians have kilometres these days, it is common to use expressions such as, “The road stretched for miles,” “It was miles away.”
Moleskins - woven heavy cotton fabric with suede-like finish, commonly used as working wear, or as town clothes
Mow (grass / lawn) - cut (grass / lawn)
Neenish tarts - Aussie tart. Pastry base. Filling is based on sweetened condensed milk mixture or mock cream. Some have layer of raspberry jam (jam = jelly in US). Topping is in two equal halves: icing (= frosting in US), usually chocolate on one side, and either lemon or pink or the other.
Open plan (house interior) - open concept
Pub - The pub at the south of a small town is often referred to as the ‘bottom pub’ and the pub at the north end of town, the ‘top pub.’ The size of a small town is often judged by the number of pubs - i.e. “It’s a three pub town.”
Red cattle dog - (variant: blue cattle dog) - referring to the breed of Australian Cattle Dog. However, a ‘red dog’ is usually a red kelpie (another breed of dog)
Stone the crows! - an expression of surprise
Takeaway (food) - Take Out (food)
Toilet - also refers to the room if it is separate from the bathroom
Torch - flashlight
Tuck in (to food) - to eat food hungrily
Ute /Utility - pickup truck
Vegemite - Australian food spread, thick, dark brown
Wardrobe - closet
Windscreen - windshield
* * *
Indigenous References
Bush tucker - food that occurs in the Australian bush
Koori - the original inhabitants/traditional custodians of the land of Australia in the part of NSW in which this book is set. Murri are the people just to the north. White European culture often uses the term, Aboriginal people.
Chapter 1
I let out a bloodcurdling scream as soon as I saw the figure looming in the door to my bedroom. Adrenaline coursed through me. The hair stood up on the back of my neck.
Willow and Hawthorn ran out of the room in terror.
But it was only Alder, half naked, towelling off his hair. “What’s wrong?” he shouted, the towel around his waist dropping to the ground.
“I forgot I was married for a moment.” I lay a hand over my thumping heart and sighed with relief.
“I’ve got to tell you, Amelia, most men get a little offended when their wives scream upon seeing them naked.” Blushing a furious pink, he scooped his towel off the floor and wrapped it around himself once more. “Two years ago I’d been shot and was in a hospital in Melbourne, and last year I was distracted because I was plucking up the courage to propose to you, but this year I’m not going anywhere, mentally or physically.”
I yawned and stretched. “What do you mean?”
“Two years ago when Marina Mercer came to demand her spell, I was away and someone tried to murder you. I won’t be away this year.”
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“Well, it wasn’t Marina two years ago. It was someone pretending to be Marina’s sister,” I pointed out.
Alder pulled a face. “You’re beginning to sound like Ruprecht.”
I waved one finger at him. “You should be pleased about that because he’s on your side about this whole Marina Mercer yearly spell thing.”
Alder grimaced. “I just don’t like it, Amelia. Something terrible happens every year and it’s all because of that spell. There must a way you can get out of it.” He swiftly crossed the room and kissed me thoroughly. “I’m not going anywhere,” he said for the umpteenth time, before walking to the door.
“Where are you going? I thought you said you weren’t going anywhere.”
Alder frowned. “I didn’t mean it like that. I have to go to work.”
I rubbed my forehead. I hoped Alder wasn’t becoming as strange as my other friends. I had to get some caffeine into me. That would make everything all right.
I yawned and stretched again, pulled on my bathrobe, and staggered into the kitchen. I hurried over to give my Nespresso coffee machine a big hug and a kiss. As much as I enjoyed drinking coffee when I was out, there was nothing quite like the way I made it myself. I switched on the machine and listened to my favourite sound in the world.
When the light stopped flashing, I made to pour the coffee, but a loud knock on the door forestalled me.
“Not Marina Mercer already!” I said to myself. “Isn’t it a bit early?”
Both cats fixed me with a glare and blocked my way. “Oh all right then.” I topped up their bowls with dry cat food and then hurried to the front door just as another knock came.
I flung open the door. There, on my doorstep, was a giant pumpkin. A terrifying face was carved into the front of it.
Chapter 2
“Camino!” I cried as the giant pumpkin wrapped its leaves around me and squeezed me hard.
“Stop it, Camino. Amelia can’t breathe.”
I looked up to see the owner of the voice of reason. It was, of course, Ruprecht.
I opened the door for them. “Come in. Camino, can you fit through the door?”
She squashed past me by way of answer, shook the rain from her onesie, and waddled into the living room. Ruprecht produced a tray of polystyrene cups. “Here’s your coffee just how you like it,” he said, handing me a cup. “I was sure you needed it. I know you arrived back from your honeymoon in the middle of the night.”
“We can’t wait to hear all about it,” Camino said in a gushing tone. “What exactly did you do on your honeymoon?”
Ruprecht’s face turned deep red. “Camino!” he admonished her. “You can’t ask questions like that.”
Camino also turned red, although it was hard to tell as bright orange material covered most of her face. “Oh, Ruprecht, sometimes I wonder about you. I was asking Amelia where she went. If you recall, it was a big secret.”
“In that case, you shouldn’t ask her to reveal the secret,” Ruprecht said in a stern voice.
I threw my hands in the air. “Alder was keeping it a secret from me before we left, but obviously it’s not a secret now. We went to Hamilton Island. The weather was lovely, and now we’ve come back to all this driving rain.”
Both made delighted sounds. “In the Whitsundays!” Camino clasped her big green leaves to her chest. “Wasn’t that near where we sent you for that cooking school. Remember? That cooking school on a tropical island?”
“How could I forget?” I said in disgust. “There was a murderer on the loose and more than one person was murdered. I was trapped on a tropical island because of a hurricane.” The memory made me tremble.
Ruprecht patted my shoulder. “Quite so, quite so. Well, all that’s in the past. As for the future, I expect Marina Mercer will be here at any minute. Are you prepared, Amelia?”
Just then, the house turned up the television. “Every time I came over to feed the cats while you were away, the house was watching A Discovery of Witches,” Camino informed me. “The TV series, that is. The main actress is an Aussie.”
“I loved the book. And have they got to the yoga part yet?” I asked.
Camino looked confused, and Ruprecht pushed on. “Amelia, this is a serious matter. Are you prepared for what Marina Mercer will ask you to do?”
I shrugged one shoulder. “How can I prepare? I’m bound to do whatever she asks me, thanks to you, Grandmother!” I ended my sentence on a raised voice.
There was no response. The volume on the TV did not change one bit. I hoped that meant my grandmother felt guilty. Still, I supposed I would have done the same in her place. She likely didn’t have any other options.
“It really would be good if there was some way around this,” Ruprecht said, “but I don’t think there is. Jasmine Walters, whose ghost appeared last Halloween, was the one who paid a powerful sorcerer to put a spell on your grandparents so they couldn’t be together in the hereafter. Your grandmother’s friend, Nama, fixed it so they could be together, but part of that deal was that Nama’s descendants could come here once a year on Halloween. Thelma’s descendants would have to grant them one spell.”
“I know that!” I said in a voice a little louder than it should have been. “We go over this every year. I can’t see how it helps. What am I supposed to do?”
My agitation was growing. I’d had the most delightful honeymoon, and now I was back facing the harsh reality of having to grant yet another Halloween spell. Something had gone wrong the past two years and I didn’t expect this would be any different.
“I think we need to be very careful,” Ruprecht said, echoing my thoughts.
I nodded my agreement. “I wonder what sort of spell it will be this year? I don’t like doing love spells, but last year Marina wanted me to do one to remove obstacles from her relationship with Alex Waring, and they’re still together.”
“Yes, you are correct,” Ruprecht said. “I do see this as a conflict.”
I had finished my coffee. “What do you mean?” I said absently. I realised I shouldn’t have spoken only after Camino shot me a warning look.
“It’s like the Euripidean conflict between Law and Nature, or as I’ve told you before, Antigone’s conflict between duty to the state and her familial duty to her brother.” He tapped his chin. “It’s like the conflict of Orestes and Electra. They must avenge their father’s death. However, as their mother had killed their father, by avenging their father’s death, they would have to kill their mother. That was as great an evil as not avenging their father’s death. Do you see what I mean?”
“No, to be honest,” I said. My head was spinning. Ruprecht said pretty much the same thing every year and I was no closer to understanding it this time.
Camino shot me another warning look.
Unfortunately, Ruprecht continued to talk. I sighed. Letting my guard down was a consequence of having been on a blissful two-week honeymoon.
Ruprecht pushed on. “It’s like the conflict between free will and determinism. Fascinating subject. You see, there are hard compatibilists—or call them illusionists if you will—semicompatibilists, incompatablists, and soft compatibilists. Need I go on?”
“No.” Camino’s voice was firm.
Ruprecht ignored her. “I mean, if you refuse to do the spell, then you are breaking the agreement your grandmother made, and it could have terrible consequences. Of course, your grandmother made the agreement decades before you were even born. You didn’t make the agreement.”
I interrupted him. “I’ll just make myself some coffee. Would you like one, Camino?”
She nodded. Ruprecht was staring at the ceiling and speaking in an animated fashion.
I fled to the refuge of the kitchen. By the time I came back from the kitchen with two steaming mugs of coffee, Ruprecht was still talking. This time he was speaking about a conflict ignored by some ancient person called Ismene, whoever that was. I think he’d spoken on the subject before, but I’d always tuned out. “Now do you understand?” Ruprecht concluded.